Monday, August 21, 2017

Monday Journal Entries





I have to wonder in years to come, ( when I am gone from this world, and my children, or grandchildren, or great grands, or some stranger perhaps comes across some of my words and they read that I mention Charlottesville and the riots that occurred there over the weekend), what will they think?  Will this world in which we live be still so racially divided or will the majority of those living at that time here in the United States have found a way to live in peace?  Will my grandchildren, who are bi-racial ever be able to live their lives without fear?  Will their wonderful dad who is one of the kindest, gentlest, loving souls I have ever met have to continue to live in a country that targets him because he is not Caucasian?  Will ever generation refuse to learn from the generations before? 

Today, I gathered my grandchildren close to me and was thankful for the peace we were able to share.  Oh, the house was not peaceful at all with three, four year olds battling for center stage and continually working out things like “sharing”, who would go “first”, and who would “be the boss”.  And a teething four and a half month old isn’t exactly peaceful either.  However, we had peace and we had love and for now, we are all safe.  My two bi-racial granddaughters and my daughter were initially scheduled to be in Charlottesville this past Saturday at a park very near where the riots broke out.  A friend of my daughter’s, who also is married to a man of a different ethnic background than her own, and Alissa were scheduled to meet for the kids to have a play date.  She felt uneasy taking the kids down there at a time when the Neo Nazi, KKK and Alternate Right groups were scheduled to protest in the area.  Thank God for the wisdom the girls had to stay away and keep those precious babies out of harms way.  So it was with a thankful heart, a more thankful hear than usual, I dealt with the chaos of having all my grands together today.  We had homemade pizza and we fed the animals and we played outside and in.  We read books and we sang songs and we ate snacks.  We fussed a little, we cried a little and we laughed a lot.  We made messes and we cleaned them up.  We got our clean clothes dirty along with our hands and faces.  We gave kisses and hugs and said our prayers. 



Dear God, please help this grandma to teach these children to love in a world full of hate, teach them that money and race and social status doesn’t make one group better than another, and that we were all created to love as You love and that is without barriers.   Thank you for another day in which to live.  Amen. 


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I missed a day journaling and the day just felt off.  I have so very much enjoyed the routine of putting down my thoughts and the events of the day.  I actually thought I had missed more than one day of journaling, but when I looked at the last date of entry, I just missed one.   I know I sound like a broken record, but our days in Staunton are just so filled, that it’s all I can do to catch my breath.  It seems like it gets harder and harder to get everything done there so we can head south.  We have a lot we need to accomplish on this trip but it’s hard to get mechanics, contractors, and business owners to really take initiative it seems.  That’s true whether we are in Staunton or our Southern Virginia home. 

Speaking of our “Southern Virginia” home, I had to laugh the other day when someone said they had heard a rumor that we were moving to South Carolina.  The way that facts get twisted as they are told can be quite amusing, as well as damaging in some instances like what happened to me several months ago regarding my grandmother.  Someday, I may write down all the particulars of that situation but for now, I am just trying to focus on the positive and the lessons I took away from that particular situation.  I wonder why people would rather make things up than go directly to the source? 

At any rate, we had wanted to get a lot done but keep running into stumbling blocks here in Southern Virginia today.  We have a diesel truck that refuses to start and Mike is trying to get it going or he will need to call a tow truck and have it taken to the garage.  We have contacted a contractor about working on our barn, but we seem to be having trouble connecting with him in such a manner as to get him out for an estimate.  With winter coming, we need to get oil and propane.  (Our house in Staunton is heated entirely with wood and Mike has already started getting it stacked up for the winter.) 

I mostly sleep better at the Rural Retreat than I do in Staunton.  I think it’s the sound of the creek running just outside our bedroom window.  The sound is so relaxing.  However, I still typically wake quite early (around 3:30 to 4:30 am).  Last night I slept really well though.  I did not get up until 7:30 am this morning!  I made homemade, blueberry muffins and perked a pot of coffee.  We had eggs to go with it and a sliced tomato.  Late afternoon, we had a BLT.  Somehow, I have let the summer slip away without making a BLT until today. 

Mike continues to put his produce out by the road on the honor system while we are in Southwest Virginia.  He makes a few dollars every day and loves doing it.  I am glad that it brings him joy and that he has found a way to keep doing it without being completely tied to it.  One of our neighbors stopped this morning and talked to Mike.  He said he has wife had gotten some produce last week and it was just the best fruit and vegetables they had eaten in a long time.  It was nice for Mike, who was out by the road setting things up, to be able to connect with one of the neighbors.  He loves it and I love him.  As I sit on the porch typing this, someone else has stopped.  Folks get what they want and put their money in a cigar box.  There’s something sweet, simple, and neighborly about that.  I hope that Mike can continue to operate in this manner without abuse.  All it takes is one person to ruin it for everyone. 

In Staunton, typically, I hit the ground running a long time before Mike and when he gets up and goes off to eat with his mom, we don’t have a whole lot of time to talk.  At our retreat, we are able to start the day slowly together and I love that.  This morning we lay I bed and something that was said brought both of us to reminiscing about when we were kids and how we would “run wild” outdoors, playing in our natural setting with very little parental intervention.  We talked about how kids today in most instances no longer do that.  I told Mike how I remember doing all kinds of dangerous things like riding the pony bareback while being barefoot and riding without a helmet.  I must have been about five.  I told him how I went to the woods and stayed for hours and no one worried about me or wondered where I was or what I was doing.  He told me how he would run all over the farm, play in the creek in the summer and during the winter, how he and his brother would pull the sled, with an axe to the top of the hill to break the ice in the pond for the cows.  Then, they would both climb on the sled, with the axe, slide down the hill, under the fence, across the road and back to the farmhouse where his grandparents lived at the time and where his mother now lives.  He also told me how that one Christmas he caught a big fish in that pond with his bare hands.  He admitted the fish was probably half frozen. 

I guess that was one of my dreams when we bought this rural property, that our grandkids would have a place where they could get lost in their own world and experience the natural surroundings without so much suburbia.  I hope they will be able to do that. 



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The “neighbors” continued to stop by for produce yesterday.  Mike talked to several of them.  I stay in the house and hope no one ventures that far.  I am beginning to admit to myself just how deeply the last betrayals have hurt me and how I have built up walls that I had finally, with time, let down.  I am afraid the walls have gone up thicker and stronger than ever before and knowing that I am definitely middle aged and at a time when it would be nice to be able to trust people, I instead find myself suspicious of most everyone’s motives.  I hate that because in spite of always being an introvert, I always operated under the premise that folks would react with goodness in most instances if that is what you expect of them.  My newly opened wounds leave me feeling in ways I don’t know that I have ever felt before this.  Even when I lost my Josh due in part to the selfish and just plain evil acts of others, I still held on to believing that my love, forgiveness and acceptance, not of the harm that was done but of the individuals who perpetrated that evil, could make a difference.  Actually, I still believe that.  I will always believe that.  Just writing it out and reflecting on my thoughts causes me to see that I really do still believe in love and the power of good over evil.  I guess I’m just tired AND in the past couple years I have come to realize that the kind of love of which I speak is sacrificial and I am too weary to know how much of that sacrificial love I have left to give except to my family and a few very close friends. 

Well, that’s enough of that for one day.  Too depressing to be the focus.  I have so much for which to be thankful and counting blessings is a much better use of time.

We went into the closest incorporated town yesterday which is approximately 15 minutes away.  We needed some parts and tools for the Ford diesel which won’t run right now.  It was a nice little excursion and while there, I picked up a few things I needed from the grocery store.  I spent the afternoon doing odd jobs around the house and then in the evening, we went to the little auction house that is near our home.  When we got home, we had a big bowl of ice cream and watched an episode of The Waltons.  In this episode, the family loses their beloved, Guernsey, milk cow named Chance.  I wondered if most folks would even understand why the family was crying over the old milk cow in this episode.  Although I know a good number of people with family cows, thanks to the internet making the world a smaller place, the family cow isn’t a common addition to most families in this day and age.  Sometimes I hate the internet and all the ugliness it can bring into a home and a life, the way it pulls at us to distract us, the way it keeps children indoors instead of playing outside like I did when I was a kid, and the way it distracts us from the things on which we should otherwise focus.  But, there are times I am very thankful for the vastness of the internet and how it has connected me to people I would never have connected with otherwise.  My family cow friends are some of those people.  We can live a world apart but we have so much in common and a connection that has given us a basis for the type of friendship that lasts.  Being sort of a throwback can make one feel isolated at times, but the internet allowed me to connect with others who love their family cows and who enjoy the homesteading/farming/ranching life as much as I do.  I am thankful for that and thankful for each of them. 

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Time is flying.  It always does but it is true that the older we get the faster time flies.  We were so busy yesterday that I was unable to even get a minute to sit down and write.  I really feel lost when that happens now that I am creating a routine of writing every day.  I am sure part of that is that I have isolated myself from Facebook and without the little blurbs and connections through the day, I am more isolated (by choice).  The journaling is so much better in so many ways.  I am thankful for those friends who write to me via US Mail and those who text and email me.  There is so much more depth to our conversations.

Saturday, I was able to get a good bit of housecleaning done.  It was so hot outside (although probably ten degrees cooler than in Staunton, as the mountains are always cooler).  I stayed indoors and knocked down cobwebs, swept, mopped, and dusted.  I am thankful that I have a very conscientious husband who does not drag a bunch of dirt in the house regardless of the fact he is always getting very dirty.  He is also good to keep his clutter to designated areas.  We typically have a neat house but I tend to let the cobwebs and dust and the dirt that tracks in build up a lot more than I use to.  Looking back, it makes me sad that I worried so much about keeping my house perfect rather than just enjoying life.  I am trying to remedy that with the second half of my life.  We also ran into the nearest little town, about 15 miles away, and picked up our truck.  We had to have it towed and worked on by a mechanic.  He was a man, probably early twenties, and he got right on it and got the job done.  We were impressed that he took care of it so quickly as we find most people don’t take that initiative.  We had just happened upon his garage the day before and I had encouraged Mike to go in and talk to him.  Mike had made multiple phone calls that morning looking for a tow truck and/or a mechanic with no satisfactory results.  The one we found by “happenstance” ended up being the ticket.

We had chicken fried cube steak with gravy, eggs, and sliced tomatoes for breakfast and I had put a pork roast in the oven with celery, potatoes and carrots for dinner.  I also made a huge bowl of pasta salad with the cucumbers and tomatoes from the garden.  People continue to stop by to get produce and Mike continues to meet folks.  He said everyone has been so nice.  They have, in fact, been nice everywhere we have been.  One thing that does concern me is the blatant prejudice from the people here towards those who have a different color of skin or are of a different race. ( I will write more of that another time as time doesn’t permit me to delve into it right now.)

Saturday, we went to a daytime auction.  It is one that we have frequented for about nine months now.  It is by far our favorite auction house.  The folks who run it are honest, which is refreshing.  They are straightforward about the quality of the items being sold and they are fair towards those who are bidding and just all around nice people.  They are also very organized which is of importance to me.  Saturday evening, we went to the local auction I described in a previous entry where some of the locals come to hang out and where it’s a lot of fun to people watch.  At one point, I saw that the seller was bringing up a quart sized hot water bath canner and mine and I wanted one to keep at the Rural Retreat rather than have to  keep taking mine back and forth between our Southern Virginia home and Staunton.  I wanted to make sure it was good with no holes in the bottom and that it had the rack so I impulsively ran to the front of the auction and asked the seller if I could see the bottom and asked if there was a rack in it.  He was showing me when I hear the auctioneer say, “All right Vanna, show the next item up for bid.”  I turned around with the canner in my hand and did my best Vanna White impersonation and bid on the canner at the same time.  No one bid against me and the seller threw in the other canner that didn’t have a lid or a rack as a backup and I got it all for two dollars and everyone had a good laugh.   So much for my remaining inconspicuous and hanging out in the back of the auction house to people watch!  Later, at the same auction, an elderly lady came in late.  She approached me before the auction was over and asked me if I would sell one of the items we had bought (for resale at the Antique mall).  She said she wanted to give it to her great granddaughter.  I really didn’t want to sell it because I knew we could make a decent profit on it at our booth, but there is no way I could tell that sweet little lady “no”.  I sold it to her for what we had in it.  She was so very happy. 

We decided that today we would try the little stone church that we had started out to visit last week but when we arrived found the service had already begun.  We didn’t really know what to expect as it was a denomination that neither of us had personally attended.  However, I was more familiar with what to expect than Mike having studied church history and having friends who attend this particular denomination.  The thing it, I am finding, a lot of folks in the area don’t fit the typical “labels” you see on the churches.  We have tried out every Brethren Church (we are Anabaptist) within driving distance (and one must drive a good distance to them) and have found every one of them to be led by Baptist trained pastors who do not preach and teach and hold to the Anabaptist background that we really are drawn to.  I had found out that several of these Rock Churches seemed to have changed from their Presbyterian roots to Baptist.  I wasn’t sure if this church would be more Presbyterian or more Baptist or something entirely different.  However, anytime I go to a church, I go with an open mind and try to get something from the service.  I figure we can all learn from one another.  Sometimes, we have to stretch a little further and try a little harder to get something from a service but I try really hard no matter what the circumstances.  Today, I didn’t have to try very hard.  As I mentioned in a previous entry, I have been struggling and not very happy about going to church anywhere recently due to being hurt by a situation that involved some Christians from two different churches by whom I felt very betrayed.  I figured this church would leave me feeling about the same, disappointed and ready to go back to introverting.  I mostly wanted to attend the service because of the local history of the church and the story behind it.  I am drawn to the history of an area, especially if that history involves rural mountain people, so very much like my own family in the Mountains of Northwest Georgia.  I went mostly out of curiosity and adventure but what we found was a handful of people in a little Mountain Church who were kind and friendly and a visiting speaker who spoke of betrayal, hurt, and forgiveness as he spoke on the story of Joseph confronting his brothers as they came to Egypt years after they had betrayed him.  I sat there with silent tears streaming down my face feeling every ounce of the hurt that I have been feeling and then letting it go holding to the belief that somehow all that has happened has served to bring about some good in spite of the ugliness I have felt. 

I had been wanting to buy the book ‘THE MAN WHO MOVED A MOUNTAIN” which told the story of these rock churches and the man who started them, but I had not taken the time to order it.  It was available at the church and I bought it today.  On the trip home, as Mike drove, I read it out loud to him which turned out to be a real treat.  Not only is the book interesting, well written, and helps satisfy my thirst for local history, but never have I been able to entertain Mike with something written for so long.  For almost two hours we read together as he drove and we were both glued to every word for the story takes place in the area where we have our new home and we recognize the landmarks mentioned in the book as places we have come to love.