Tuesday, October 31, 2017

Barn and Outbuilding Restoration Udate Photos


"Before" view of front and right side
Comparative view after day two


Front and left side of barn with metal shed on back "before" work began

Front of barn after day two with board and batting complete on this section.

Back view of barn with shed.  Metal will be replaced with board and batting.

Shed after metal was removed.  Awaiting board and batting.  

View from "above" of barn after three days of labor.  Still plenty to do!

Monday, October 30, 2017

Monday Journal Entry




October 26, 2017

It’s Thursday and I will attempt to update my journal.  It seems that last week was full of tidbits that I wanted to remember, but so far, this week has seemed pretty typical.  That’s not a bad thing, but it just doesn’t leave much interesting about which to write.  That’s ok, though.  A comfortable, settled week is a good thing.  So much of the week is repetitive or previous weeks and doesn’t lend itself to interesting journaling:  Sunday we traveled and the interstate was horrible, Monday I kept the kids and they were wild, Tuesday was a rush to run errands and then get back to watch the kids for four and a half hours that evening, and Wednesday was an effort to get things packed and ready to return to Southwest Virginia where again, Interstate 81 was challenging.  I do think that we are falling into more of a routine back in Staunton and that everyone is adjusting to the communal living.  The little girls are so cute but definitely know how to manage the four adults in the house to get as much attention and playtime with us as possible.  Rory has two teeth that have popped out and she is very interested in eating.   Analia nursed exclusively until she was about nine months old and was content.  Rory has been a different story.  Now that we have started her on some solid food and she has begun drinking out of a sippy cup, she is a little more content when momma is gone.  Alissa has been working with Analia for a good while teaching her letter sounds and recognition.   She is starting to try to sound out words and she loves “doing school” like mommy.  She does not like to write however, and I think that may be an issue when she starts kindergarten.  She has difficulty with some things and finger dexterity is one of them.  The pediatricians feel that she may have a Sensory Processing disorder as well.  This is something that Alissa and I have been aware of for quite some time.  She is highly sensitive to sound and activity.  Hudson and Ella were with us on Monday and that is always a busy time with all four of the grands.  We had the best day that we have had since I started having all four of them together on Mondays when Alissa went back to work after Rory was born.  Rory actually took a long nap and the older kids had long periods of interactive play without arguments.  Monday evening, I put in some extra time helping with the girls after supper because Alissa was behind on her papers for her Masters due to Analia being sick over the weekend and Rory being so fussy cutting teeth. 

Mike got his soy beans harvested last week and got them to market.  He was pretty pleased with the yield and with the price he received for them.  (The prices fluctuate with the stock market and a farmer has to take what he is given.  He didn’t get them in when they were at their highest but they have steadily come down a bit after his beans were contracted.)  Folks are starting to think about winter and getting hay for their horses.  A lot of the hay Mike makes and most of what he sells goes to equine owners and he has a good reputation with his customers for making quality horse hay.  A number of his customers are in a panic because they have heard that we are moving south and they are afraid they won’t be able to get hay from him and they don’t want to get it from anyone else.  We are starting to get frost in the valley but Mike was able to harvest a few more tomatoes and pulled some green that we can let ripen in the windows.  There was also a good bit of volunteer lettuce and some beets and potatoes to be harvested.  He got the last of the potatoes out of the ground.  We had a very poor year with our potatoes and for the first time in 30 years did not sell to the public.  We will probably have enough to get our family through the winter.  We typically use 4-5 bushels. 

One little tidbit I have been meaning to get down in my journal is the encounter Mike had with a neighbor who stopped in the driveway and introduced himself two weeks ago.  He told Mike that he was interested in buying a lot at the top of our property where we have views of Buffalo Mountain.  He said his wife had been coveting a spot where she can build a new home with views of The Buffalo.  I have to laugh now but that was not my reaction when Mike told me.  My response was “I hope you told him we are not interested in selling ANY of our property and especially not my hiking spot where I can see The Buffalo.”  Mike replied, “Well, I told him I would think about it” and he grinned.  That of course pushed my buttons and I went into a long retort about how there was no way I would ever sell and it’s a good thing that it was him and not me talking to the man because I would have made sure he recognized the facts and I wouldn’t have wasted an hour of my time talking to him.  My extroverted husband just grinned and said something about being nice to the neighbors.  Later I just thought to myself that it proved my point to my Shenandoah Valley raised third generation farmer who sees value in the flat bottom land but has a hard time seeing the value that this Mountain girl sees in the steep hills and rougher terrain.  The value is there to those seeking a homesite on a few acres but this stubborn farm girl is determined that her Jerseys will graze on that spot and for as long as I am able, I will continue to seek out those views when I hike to the top of our “hill”. 

Mike and I were both really excited when we pulled onto our SW Virginia property just before sunset and saw that the crew did indeed start work on the barn this week.  We were not here Monday but heard that there were torrential rains (several inches of heavy rain) that kept the workers away on Monday.  I’m not sure if it dried out enough for them to start Tuesday but they had definitely worked Wednesday putting board and batting on our old barn.  Even though the process has just started, it’s easy to see that the transformation is going to be amazing.  Mike was pleased with the quality of their work and with the lumber that was used.  They are supposed to return today and tomorrow, weather permitting.  I am eager to see how much they can get done.  Mike intends to go out and start tearing all the old metal off the shed attached to the back of the barn.  That will be replaced with lumber and tie the whole thing together giving it a fresh look and providing a warm shelter for the cattle during the mountain winters. 

October 27, 2017

Today is my brother’s (Jimmy) birthday.  I have two brothers and a sister.  My brother Jimmy is 3 and a half years younger and I was not the typical child who feels displaced when they have been an only child for a while and get a new baby brother or sister.  In fact, my family enjoyed telling the story that I prayed often for a baby brother before he was born.  It has been told to me that my mother was fearful of how I would react should I end up with a baby sister instead of a brother, because my prayers were so specific.  If there was every any jealousy on my part directed toward Jimmy, I don’t remember it nor have I been told of it.  My other two siblings came much later, a brother (Shane) and a sister (Elizabeth).  I am fourteen years older than Shane and 16 years older than Elizabeth and I actually left home when Elizabeth was just two years old attending a year of college in Florida and then moving to Alaska where I attended the University of Alaska for a while, worked at Ft. Greely army base and for the State of Alaska Legislative Information Office.  I had my nineteenth birthday enroute to Alaska .  Life sure moves fast and never would I have dreamed then that I would be a grandmother, fifty years old, and keeping house in rural Virginia. 

Yesterday was a really busy day and a good bit was accomplished, although Mike feels that the crew working on the barn is slow.  Barn is such an aggressive worker and there are very few who can meet his expectations when it comes to quantity of work.  Guess that’s why I consider it a real compliment when I overhear that he has told others that I am a hard worker.  I’m afraid both of us tend to have the type of personality that makes us pretty focused on accomplishing goals.  But, the barn is looking good and it is requiring a lot of work to restore it.  The crew has half the barn (front and one side) covered with new board and batting.  There is a large shed attached to the back of the barn that is covered in metal.  Mike worked last night on getting all that metal off so that the men could start working on enclosing it with lumber today.  Mike is trying to do as much as he can do personally to save us some money.  It was a chilly morning when the men started yesterday with temps around 32 degrees.  It warmed up during the day and the sun shone, but it remained cool.  I woke up around 3 am yesterday morning and got my day started early.  I unpacked a few fall decorations and got them up.  For the last few years, I have decorated quite a bit for fall but I realized yesterday that most of what I used to decorate with were things we were selling at our produce stand like pumpkins, gourds and mums.  Since we didn’t have the bins of fall pumpkins and gourds that we bought in bulk to sell to our produce customers for me to sort through and use the “extras”, my decorating was minimal this year.  We didn’t grow any pumpkins or gourds ourselves this year and the only pumpkins I ended up with were the half a dozen a friend gave to us after gleaning a farmer’s field and picking up seconds to feed his hogs.  I fixed eggs, toast, fried potatoes and eggs for breakfast but about the time I was ready to eat, Mike came inside and said he was leaving to go to the lumber yard with the contractor.  I ended up putting his breakfast away and eating mine alone before I got started working.  I cleaned the house pretty thoroughly from top to bottom and washed and hung clothes out on the line to dry.  About the time I finished up with my cleaning and was getting ready to go for a hike to the back part of our property, Mike came in and said that a neighbor who owns three acres of adjoining property wanted us to walk up and talk to them.  They are older than us and have used their property as a campsite for about four years.  They have a fifth wheel trailer sitting there and a little shed.  They wanted to see if we were interested in buying their piece of property as they stated “they had started too late in life” with their dream of owning it and building a home.  The lady has some health issues and is also caring for her elderly mother whom I think she said is bed ridden.  They live three hours away and about all they can get done is to get down every other week to mow and keep the place up.  The three acres would be nice for us to own, but currently they want more for it than what it’s worth to us.  Probably half (or more) of the land is a steep wooded bank that joins our property on one side and has road frontage (a very rural, dirt road) on the other side.  There are two streams running through the property and a lot of the property is “wetlands”.   We are pretty sure from previous research that the property at one time was part of the 250-acre Jackson Farm, of which we own a portion.  The couple said there had been a tenant house on the property they own that was in shambles and they had cleaned up the lot, hauling away the garbage and crumbling house piece by piece.  There is no question that they have done a tremendous amount of work and the lot looks like the perfect campground, but a little wet for a permanent home site, although I have no doubt there would be those who would attempt a home there.  I would love to have the three-acre lot, but I am doubting they will be able to let it go for a price we feel comfortable paying as it would probably end up just being additional grazing land for us. 

Last night we had the last of the beets from the garden.  I like to peel and slice them and then lay them in an oven proof dish with butter and salt, cover them and bake until tender.  It seems cooking them this way makes them even more tasty as they don’t lose any of the color or flavor that one loses when boiling them.  We also had some tomatoes that Mike found that had been safe from the frosts.  I have some ripe tomatoes in the refrigerator now and a window full of green tomatoes.  They won’t be quite as good as the vine ripened but they will taste better than the hot house variety one buys in the grocery store and there’s a satisfaction from knowing that we raised them.  We also had some volunteer lettuce from the garden and I made a salad with vinegar and oil dressing.  I used our grass finished sirloin steak and cut it in strips and fried it with the onions, bell peppers, and potatoes we got from our garden.  The only thing on the table we didn’t produce ourselves was the fried apples and those were from a local, mountain orchard.  It was such a simple but delicious meal. 

October 29, 2017

We left our SW Virginia property really late this weekend and I am sitting in the truck with my computer across my knees trying to catch up on my journal.  It’s 9:30 pm, the wind is blowing 25 to 30 miles per hour and it was spitting snow when we left our mountain home.  Neither of us ever want to leave and that was true especially tonight.  We had a good weekend with our house full of people that we love.  I had invited a good number of family and friends but I knew most of them would not be able to make it because of the three-hour drive from Staunton.  Mike’s sister and her son and his family who only live an hour away in Christiansburg were able to come to our fall get together.  Alissa and her two girls made it as well.  It was cloudy and cold, so we decided to stay indoors instead of eat in the picnic shelter like I had originally planned.  I did use the fire pit to cook the burgers and hot dogs.  Cathy brought potato salad that she made and JoAnna made her delicious broccoli salad.  I had sliced tomatoes, lettuce and onions from the garden.  We had homemade sweet pickles and homemade ketchup.  I made BBQ meatballs, baked beans and macaroni and cheese.  We had a variety of homemade cookies that I had made up ahead of time and pulled out of the freezer:  snicker doodles, chocolate chip, oatmeal, shorbread, and sugar cookies.  The best thing about when we all get together is there is no stress or pressure.  Cathy and JoAnna are fantastic about bringing food and helping to clean up.  We all laugh a lot, talk a lot, and the time together goes by too quickly. 

Alissa and the girls were not feeling the best this morning.  The girls both of colds. So, we decided to forgo trying to go to church this morning and just stay home with them.  Analia was very concerned that we might go without her and I didn’t want to take her and expose the elderly people to anything contagious she might have.  Alissa left earlier than us to head back to Staunton but turned around and came back when she thought her care was acting up.  Mike checked it out and it seemed to be all right, so she took off again about an hour and a half after her initial departure.  She said traffic wasn’t too terrible until she got almost to Staunton and then the interstate shut down.  So far, the traffic for us has been better than most weekends and I am thinking that traveling this late might be a bit better as far as traffic is concerned. 

This was supposed to be a “short” week for me with the grands and I had planned on only keeping them tomorrow (Monday) and then heading back to Laurel Fork on Tuesday.  However, Alissa has to present at a conference in Washington DC on Friday and I had offered to keep Analia for her.  I didn’t want Analia to miss out on Halloween with her family and then she has dance lessons on Wednesday morning.  So, it looks like we won’t be leaving until after her dance class on Wednesday.  She will stay with us until we return to Staunton the following Sunday.  Alissa is taking Rory with her as she nurses her and she doesn’t take a bottle very well, nor does she like to be away from mom. 

We were happy to get some things accomplished this week at the SW Virginia property but things didn’t progress as well as we would have liked.  However, I am going to focus on the what we did accomplish.  A lot of work was done to the barn and the work that was done was quality work.  The guys are getting paid by the hour and are slower than we had hoped they would be, but the quality of work is great.  We are only going to be able to pay them for another couple days work and then we will have them stop and try to complete the back shed by ourselves to save money.  We are not having much luck with getting anyone to do the roof.  The “snake handler” seems to have worked on a few areas and made them better but possibly made the roof worse in other areas and he isn’t allowed to return.  (He came by to get a few tools he left and it was obvious he had already been drinking heavily and we don’t want him on the roof where he can injure himself.)  The second man we had lined up to work on the roof (the one who worked on our gutters and then our chimney that Mike and I both held in high regard and were sure would come through for us) failed to show up or get in contact with us this weekend, so it looks like that one isn’t going to work out either.  Mike is going to try to contact someone else tomorrow and see if we can get any response from him and if we can,  we will just go ahead and put on a new roof and be done with trying to find someone to repair the old roof. 

The crew did show up to begin the process for the whole house generator.  There were four of them and they worked for about eight hours.  Everything is in place and now we have to wait for the propane company to come and run the lines into the house.  After that is completed, the Generac crew will return to get the generator up and running.  I will feel much better when that is operational because if we are away and the electricity goes out, we won’t have to worry about pipes freezing up or losing what we have stored in our freezers. ( I didn’t plan very well when the crew came to install the generator.  It never occurred to me that they would have the electricity turned off for most of the day.  I had to find things to do that didn’t involve electricity and that put me a little behind on getting things ready for our get together on Saturday, but it all worked out.)

I was excited on Friday evening when the draft mules who live in the meadow across the road from us (I like to refer to the mules as our nearest neighbor) were returned from being temporarily housed at the resort down the road.    Their owner has a big event with the Shriners in July every year and they use the mules to pull carriages and wagons for that event as well as others.   I love to observe the mules, the deer, the wild turkey and the occasional bear in the meadow in front of our house.  The more we stay at our SW Virginia home, the more contrast we see with the busy lifestyle of the Shenandoah Valley.  When I first moved to the valley 13 years ago and looked around at the view from our house sitting on top of the knoll, I observed all the houses and the busy “rural” road and had a twinge of longing for the remote places that I have lived in Alaska and out west.  There was so much culture shock for me when I moved from the remote areas to the Lynchburg/Bedford area of Virginia back in 2001 and then to the Valley in 2005.  While the Valley is nothing like Northern Virginia or a busy metropolis, it certainly remains faster paced and more congested than what I had been use to for most of my adult life up until that point.  However, I have been happy in the Valley with the farm and my family for these years and had grown accustomed to it.  But, with more and more time spent in the mountains in South West Virginia, I am beginning to feel more at home than I have since leaving Alaska and Montana.  What thrills my heart is that Mike is so happy there too.  Having never lived anywhere but the Valley, I find contentment in hearing him say how much he loves our new home, our new farm, and how content he is when we are there.  The more I contemplate life and the more I grow, the more I realize that everything is temporary and that we are to enjoy each day as it comes for everything can change in the blink of an eye.  I try not to hold on too tightly to what we have in the Valley or in the Mountains, but enjoy each day and the blessings it brings. 

Sunday, October 29, 2017

Soul Full Sunday


“I suppose that since most of our hurts come through relationships so will our healing, and I know that grace rarely makes sense for those looking in from the outside.”


  ~ William Paul Young, The Shack

Wednesday, October 25, 2017

Shortbread Cookies (Reviewed and Updated November 7, 2023)



Shortbread Cookies


Don't let the simplicity of this recipe deter you from trying these delicious cookies.  The lightly sweet, buttery flavor makes them one of my favorite treats.

The shortbread recipe is ancient and the first written recipe for these sweet treats is attributed to a Scottish woman by the name of Mrs. McClintock who purportedly included it in a cookbook in 1736!  

Shortbread Cookie Recipe

1 ¼ Cups Flour
3 Tablespoons Granulated Sugar
½ Cup Butter

Combine flour and sugar.  Cut in butter until mixture resembles fine crumbs and starts to cling.  Form the mixture into a ball.  Knead until smooth. 

To make shortbread rounds:  On a lightly floured surface roll dough until ½ inch thick.  Using a 1 1/2 inch cookie cutter, cut into 24 rounds. Place 1 inch apart on an ungreased cookie sheet.  Bake for 20 to 25 minutes. 

Variations:

Lemon Poppy Seed: Stir in 1 Tablespoon poppy seeds into flour mixture and add 1 teaspoon finely shredded lemon peel with the butter. 

Spiced:  Substitute brown sugar for granulated sugar and stir ½ teaspoon ground cinnamon, ¼ teaspoon ground ginger, and 1/8 teaspoon ground cloves into the flour mixture.

Lemon Lavender:  Stir in one to two Tablespoons of lemon zest with the butter.  Add 2 Teaspoons of crushed, dried lavender to flour mixture. 




Monday, October 23, 2017

Monday Journal Entries


October 19, 2017

It’s Thursday, noon, and finally I am sitting down to write a bit.  It has been a busy week, an emotional week, an exhausting week, and a week with some out of my ordinary “interaction and encounters”.  Overwhelmingly, this week will be remembered as the date when my Aunt left this world and moved on to her new home.  She wasn’t happy about having to leave her physical home and go into the nursing home sometime back, and having a strong personality, she made that clear to anyone who visited her.  I wasn’t expecting the call that I received that told me she had passed.  I mistakenly thought those of us who love her had more time.  Just a week ago I thought I would like to take pen and paper and sit down with her and jot down stories that she could share.  I waited too late now.  We who love her allow ourselves the grief that tears at our heart, but we also know that she was ready to go.  We can take comfort that she has found her freedom, her rest, and her peace.  Next to my maternal and paternal grandmothers, my aunt was the strongest female influence in my life.  When I walked into her home, I always immediately felt like I was the most important person in the world, regardless if I was four years old or forty-four years old.  She just had that way of engaging with someone that made them feel like they were the center of her attention for that moment.  She was interested in what I had to say even when I was a child and felt like a lot of adults didn’t care what I thought.  She did more to teach me about my mountain roots than anyone else and yet I didn’t realize at the time that she was building that foundation.  In conversational tones and in her no-nonsense way she made grief a part of life for me that didn’t have to be shunned.  Where others were afraid to talk about those who had passed on by walking through death’s door, she was able to talk about them in such a way that helped me to understand that remembering them was as natural as breathing.  She talked of my mother, her granddaughter Julie with whom I was close in age, her daddy who died when my daddy (her brother) was only three, and two of her sisters who had passed one in infancy and the other long, long before I was even a thought.   She helped me to understand the importance of sharing our memories with future generations so that they have a connection to their roots.  She was not a highly educated person but she praised learning and worked tirelessly to encourage first my brother and I and later her own grandchildren to learn their ABC’s, their numbers, reading, writing, and arithmetic.  If one sent her a picture they drew, a card or letter they wrote, or a sample of school work completed she treasured it like it was special. To her, it was important.  Years later, one might find something they had written taped to the wall in her house.  She strongly influenced my demonstrative tendency to associate food with love and love with food. Preparing and serving food was a service in love. When you walked in her door, you knew that she would find you something to eat no matter what time of the day it might be.  More times than not, she had tucked away for me at least one jar of her “famous” sauerkraut. I loved her kraut.   She knew it and always thought of me when she made it.  When I became an adult, I asked her how she made her kraut and I began to experiment and try to make it the same way I remembered hers tasting.  She told me once that in order for it to be good I had to cut the cabbage up by hand.  I cheat and use a food processor to grate my cabbage, and I think of her every time I do it and know she would smile but disapprove all the same.  Maybe a little rough around the edges, my Aunt never had an easy life.  I guess she would be considered impoverished her entire life by most but I think she was really rich.  She was rich in knowledge of the “old ways” of the mountain.  She was rich in wisdom that allowed her to take life’s hardships and share her experiences in a way that made a young child like me less afraid to face whatever life offered.  She was rich in love and rich in her relationships.  She was strong.  She was stubborn.  She was independent.  She had a huge impact on my life and is a big part of who I am.  I saw her weaknesses and imperfections but my realization of her humanity only served to cause me to admire her that much more.  I have long said that the women in my family on my father’s side are what held our family together for generations.  They have been our strongest link.   To me, my Aunt will always be the tangible, touchable link to the strong women in our family tree.   I miss her.  I love her.  I feel a little lost knowing she has gone but her example will always encourage and propel me forward and I hope I can teach my grandchildren a little bit of what she taught me.  In this manner, she will always be with us. 



Monday was a typical Monday with all four of the grandkids.  Rory just isn’t very content away from her momma and it makes it a long day for me.  The three older ones are always exceptionally rowdy with the excitement of seeing each other only once a week.  It makes for a lot of chaos, but at the end of the day, I am always glad that we had the opportunity to be together, even though it is a hard day for me.  The twins were adorable when they arrived Monday morning.  They told their momma that Analia lived at Tita and Papa’s house and they wanted to move in too!  I told them all to come on.  Monday evening, seemingly from out of nowhere, Analia said to me, “Tita, I love spending time with you.”  Those are the moments that make it all worthwhile. 

Tuesday, after milking,  I took a little “me” time and managed to squeeze in a pedicure.  That ended up being an interesting experience.  The Asian husband and wife team was there as usual but there was a young man there I had never seen.  It soon became apparent that he was going to be my technician.  I noticed immediately that he had excellent English and just assumed that he had grown up in the United States.  He was very concerned that I “relax” and it was apparent that he was trying very hard to make sure that he was doing everything correctly.  His methods were a little different from what I was use to, but he was doing fine and I was starting to relax and then he started talking.  Those who know me well know that I don’t like idle chit chat with someone with whom I am unfamiliar but I reached real deep for an extra dose of “friendly” and responded to his chatter.  He was from Viet Nam and much to my surprise, had only been in the United States for eleven days.  Then I asked how he was able to have such good command of English and he explained that English as a second language was something he had pursued since he was preschool age and had received an English coloring book from an uncle.  He had some formal training as a middle-aged child, but got bored with that when other children in the class wasted most of the class time by acting out.  His desire was strong enough that he stayed long enough to get all the books and then taught himself much of what he has learned with the English language.  He explained that he wanted to talk in complete sentences, not broken English and he wanted to master the “accents” so that he did not sound like he had a foreign accent.  He had studied YouTube videos of both British and American English-speaking people and he had studied grammar and sentence structure.  He has been accepted as a pre-med student at Mary Baldwin, the University where Alissa graduated.  I have no doubt he will do well.  He asked me if I knew why he had chosen to give pedicures as a means of an income and I told him I did not know.  He proceeded to tell me that because he wanted to work in the medical field, he thought that providing a service to people was a good way for him to learn to help and practice humility.  I have to say, I was impressed by the young man who seemed genuine and eager.  I realized that I was one of the “first Americans” with whom he was expressing himself and sharing his dreams and expectations.  Knowing how selfish, heartless, and cruel the world can be, I felt the need to give him my attention as he spoke and not try to discourage discourse even though I would have rather put myself in a bubble.  The discussion progressed to his asking me what I did for a living which led to a discussion on farming, which naturally would lend itself to a discussion of food at which time he asked me if I was familiar with Vietnamese food.  I told him I was not.  He then wanted to share his homemade lunch with me.  Now anyone who knows me knows how picky I am about where I eat, knowing how the food was prepared, and making sure that any meat I eat has been raised and butchered according to certain standards.  I knew to decline his offer would be hurtful to the young man.  This was not an American offering me half of their McDonalds Chicken Nuggets and secretly hoping I would say I didn’t want them.  I instinctively knew that this young man’s offer was an offer of friendship and a way for him to share himself with me.  I swallowed hard, pushed the fear out of my head, and thanked him for his kindness and accepted his offer.  A million thoughts went through my head that I am actually ashamed to even repeat, but I will say they are no different than the thoughts I have about food when I eat anywhere with which I am unfamiliar.  I pushed them all aside and when the young man brought me a bowl of rice with some type of dried pork sprinkled on the top, I took a bite hoping I could tolerate not only the taste but also that the meat would not upset my stomach.  Since I do not eat much meat but that which we have personally raised, my body seems to revolt against me when I do eat from an alternative source.  The first bite was delicious and I had no trouble with my palate accepting the dish.  The only trouble I had was that I knew this was a “dried” pork of some type and I worried that the jerky type meat might not have reached high enough temperatures to make it safe for me to eat.  My other issue was the texture of the fat which was there in several pieces that resembled small pieces of bacon fat but had more of a softer, undercooked texture.  I ate the meal with my new friend and I thanked him repeatedly for his kindness and generosity.  I walked away with absolutely no after affects to my digestive system and feeling like I had responded the correct way even though the whole situation was outside my comfort zone and that the whole experience had somehow been orchestrated by the Universe for both the young man and I to practice loving those who are different from us. 



Tuesday evening proved to be challenging with Rory being worse at night than she is during the day about her mom’s absence.  She’s such happy child when her mom is around, always smiling, and content to entertain herself mostly.  Not the case when mom is away at school.  Doing anything other than holding the baby is next to impossible and I feel sorry for Analia who has to learn to tolerate the fussiness while sharing her Tita.  I’m unable to do much with Analia because I have to devote so much of my attention to the inconsolable Rory.  Somehow, I managed to keep the kids, pick up a little, and make supper for everyone in part because I had the forethought to get as much ready ahead of time as possible previous to the kids being handed over to my care.  Before Alissa left, Analia and I had chosen the potatoes for supper and she helped me was them.  She loves to stand at the kitchen sink and wash the potatoes while I peel them for supper.  I never refuse to let her help me because I want her to learn to work and to help.  She also helps me set the table.  I know at four she might drop a plate or break a dish and the table looks as if it has been set by a four-year-old when she is finished but this is important stuff and I want to encourage her participation.  I always wonder at adults who make little kids feel in the way when they are young and want to help and then expect them to help when they are older and don’t understand why they have no interest.  I had the potatoes cut up and ready to fry and the hamburger ready for patties.  We warmed up lima beans from a few days previous.  When Alissa got home, she brought us a treat of fresh donuts for afterwards.  She brought me a blueberry “cake” donut which was moist and absolutely delicious. 

Wednesday morning, I milked Faith and Shar.  I had separated their heifer calves, this time under a permanent situation.  It is time to wean the heifers.  After I milked, I cleaned up and went to an elderly friend’s house.  She had contacted me about some vintage and antique items she had to find homes for as she and her husband downsize and get ready to move.  I felt honored that she had asked me to come and to help her find a place for some of the items that are so full of memories for her.  As we looked over the items, I asked her questions about some of them and it felt so good to be able to share in her memories, although it made me sad to know that she was unable to keep these pieces that held sentimental value to her.  Again, I find myself trying to put myself in the place of someone of age as best as I can and think about what it must be like for them.  I hope that as I interact with our wonderful senior citizens that I am able to show them the respect that they deserve.  I hope my actions and words somehow indicate to them that I care and that I am seeking to understand their position.

 Again, I look at life and the experiences it presents to us and the opportunities for us to use those experiences for individual growth.  How can I be more loving?  How can I be more understanding?  How do I demonstrate to others that I care?  How do we balance the business of life and our own need for “down” time with the needs of others so that we can ease each other’s burdens?  How do we offer the proper kinds of supports to people of all ages and backgrounds while at the same time allowing them their independence and self-expression?  Life offers us a chance to grow and learn and share love and compassion over and over again and practice makes perfect.  Well, maybe not perfect, because I for one don’t believe we will ever achieve perfection, but life offers us lots of opportunities to be better people. 



I’m not on the schedule for Wednesday child care for the girls but Mike needed Gabino who is the child care provider for part of the day.  Mike asked me if I would get back as soon as possible from my visit and watch the girls so that he and Gab could move a load of hay.  I was under the impression we were talking a couple hours but I was under the wrong impression.  Rory was not happy about the arrangements that involved both of her parents leaving home and her being stuck with Tita again.  The child began fussing almost immediately and graduated to crying which eventually progressed to full-fledged screaming.  Pretty much that was the story for the rest of the night.  A babysitter usually relieves Gab around 5 pm after he has watched the girls for four hours and she keeps them until Alissa gets home sometime around 8:30 pm.  When the babysitter arrived, I handed Rory over to her to see if she could do any better with her than I could.  I went outside to do the evening chores and returned about 30 minutes later to find a screaming baby and a babysitter who was happy to hand her back over to me.  Analia was thrilled to thereafter have the sitter all to herself and I was pleased that she gave Analia such wonderful attention.  It was good for Analia who is an excellent big sister but has given up her time alone with the adults in her life since baby sister’s arrival. 

Once it became apparent to me that my husband wasn’t coming home at a reasonable time and that I was going to have the screaming Rory for a total of approximately 8 hours for the day and realizing I had eaten nothing but a handful of unhealthy cheese puffs and a glass of milk, I decided to order pizza for everyone.  Pizza delivery does come to our door in Staunton but I only indulge in that luxury about once every year or two.  I placed my order and didn’t think any more about it.  The owners know where we live and I have never had a problem before with delivery.  After an Indiana number popped up four times in a row on my phone which I didn’t answer having a habit of ignoring all questionable calls, I finally answered it the fifth time it rang.  It dawned on me that it just might be the pizza delivery since the pizza still had not arrived.  Yes, it was the poor, young pizza boy and he was lost.  Standing in our house on the hill with a view of the surrounding area with a screaming baby on my hip, I was able to locate him before he could locate me and guide him to our house.  I turned on all the lights in our octagonal home and told him to look for the house on the hill that was lit up like a space ship as the lights filter through the skylights.  It worked.  He located me and made his way up our drive.  The pizza was cold but by that time, I didn’t care. 

Baby girl was happy when momma came through the door, I ate five pieces of pizza which ended up causing havoc on my stomach because the pepperoni on the American pizza did not agree with my intestines even though the dried pork on the Vietnamese dish did me no harm.  We hurriedly packed our things when Mike arrived home and left Staunton at 9:30 pm and arrived in Laurel Fork after midnight.  I’m thankful for my time with those I love in Staunton at the beginning of the week and now I relieved to have some time to catch my breath.  We are not without a multitude of things to do here the next few days but we will intentionally try to regroup and rest a little before we head back to Staunton on Sunday. 

October 20, 2017

I awoke early with a feeling of deep loss in my heart and a longing to be with my family today as they lay my Aunt to rest.  I really debated trying to make the trip so that I could be there for the graveside service, but being overwhelmingly fatigued and also still having some stomach issues going on yesterday (probably from too much pepperoni pizza Wednesday night), I decided we would not try to make such fast trip.  This morning’s thoughts are filled with memories and a strong sense of the ties that bind our family together no matter how busy we may get or how many miles separate us.  A little piece of my heart will be buried with my Aunt this afternoon but a little piece of her heart will live on inside of mine and in this way, love never dies.

I didn’t get a whole lot accomplished yesterday.  I took a while to catch up on my journal and I read a chapter out of the Pema Chodron book I am rereading.  I made pancakes with maple syrup and scrambled eggs for breakfast.  We had no fresh tomatoes for the first time to eat along with our meal.  Nothing like the absence of garden tomatoes to bring home the reality that summer is really over; that, and the fact that it was only 32 degrees with a heavy frost when we woke up.  I had some roast beef left over from Sunday that I had put I the freezer and I pulled that out for supper.  We ate it over egg noodles with the gravy and had green beans and corn that I had put up earlier in the year.  I cleaned what I call “the guest cabin” which is a primitive apartment over the detached garage.  It gets dusty and full of cobwebs when it sits and I wanted it to be cleaned up a little bit before next weekend, when we are having a family get together here.  I never know how many people will be spending the night and I wanted to have everything ready in case someone needs to use the cabin.  I really struggled with a stomach ache yesterday which slowed me down but I think it was probably just a combination of not eating the “right” foods the night before, stress, fatigue, and emotions. 

We had some men show up yesterday to pour a concrete pad on which the whole house generator will sit.  At least that project seems to be moving forward.  They tentatively plan on coming back next Friday to hook up the generator, although I don’t know if things will be in place for them to connect to the propane at that point as we are still waiting on folks from the various propane companies to give us their bids to run the lines into the house.  One of the men pouring concrete had lost an adult son very suddenly about nine weeks ago to a sudden and unexpected illness.  It was, of course, overwhelmingly on his mind and he talked to Mike about it.  Mike told him that I had lost a son as well and when I was making my way back to the cabin to clean, the man stopped me and told me about his son.  I could see he needed to talk and we did.  His grief is so fresh that he is having difficulty finding his way right now.  I hope that in some way, my presence and my willingness to listen was helpful to him.  I wish there was more that I could do, but I know from personal experience that he will have to find his own way to learn to deal with his loss and at this point, it’s more about being present in the moment with the person who is grieving than any words that one can say.  I did tell him that his grief would change with time and that although he would always miss his son and feel the loss, that he would also grow stronger and better able to deal with it.  We talked about his children and grandchildren that remain and how that focusing on them will help him keep going. 

When we arrived here after midnight Wednesday night/Thursday morning I saw that the ladder was still against the side of the house and that the man had not returned to put the cap on the chimney like he said he was going to.  He had told Mike that he would come on Tuesday to finish the job and get the ladder.  I am hoping he returns as he said he would.  I really thought this man was going to be the one who would follow through.  He is supposed to return this Saturday to do some work on the barn roof, so I hope there is no delay with that.  We just can’t get anything done on the barn and I am getting so discouraged.  It’s just been one person after another making big promises and then not following through.  The “snake handler” of previous weeks who disappeared after Mike gave him an advance, was at the house on Tuesday but found the gate locked.  Guess he just wanted in to get the few items he left.  He went through an elaborate apology about how he had all these things come up and that’s why he couldn’t be here to work.  He told Mike he would hang around to work off the money Mike had advanced him but there is nothing to show that he did anything other than retrieve his things.  And so the barn that I believed would be completed by the end of October will probably not be finished this fall at all.  Mike threatens to get up on the barn roof and do it himself, but I refuse to give him my blessing to do that. (I actually, I am pretty adamant in my demands that he not consider it.)  The roof is steep, he doesn’t have the equipment he needs, and it is not worth the risk of him falling.  There was a time when I would not have been able to keep him off of it but as he gets closer to 60 than 50 and since he went through the shoulder surgery last year and knows how hard it is to heal at this age, he is at least listening for now. 

October 21, 2017

The time in South West Virginia this week isn’t stacking up exactly the way I would have liked, but I’m trying to accept it as it comes and let go of expectations.  Expectations truly do rob us of contentment.  We have had to do more “running” than I personally like to try to get materials together for the barn.  I have a feeling it’s in vain and that the man isn’t going to show up today.  So here I am with all the eagerness to get to work on the barn and the excitement of a restoration project that completed will bring us one step closer to making this place functional for us and our handyman won’t return texts or calls and has not made any effort to confirm that he will be here to work this weekend.  My initial reaction is to give in to the despair and disappointment that I am feeling.  However, I am going to try to just go with this and accept the fact that we just have to keep trying.  Allowing myself to feel agitated, anxious, and sad over the situation does nothing to remedy the situation and keeps me from the joy that life has to offer today. 

It feels like the two days we have been here have been days without a lot of accomplishment.  Again, setting and achieving goals are a way that makes me feel good about myself.  Not being able to accomplish much makes me feel worthless but these feelings serve no purpose other than to allow me to be critical of myself or to turn that around and try to blame others which in turn keeps me from really experiencing what life is trying to gift me.  Today I am going to work on acknowledging these negative feelings and then letting them go so that I can be open to the things that are truly important in life.  That means letting go of what I perceive to be expectations of others as well as expectations I have for myself. 

Alissa texted me yesterday to tell me that Analia has a stomach virus complete with a fever.  It appears that my little bout with stomach cramps on Thursday was not from something I ate but more than likely a virus.  My round with it was very minor compared to Analia’s but I am glad that we didn’t try to make the trip to Georgia and take a chance on exposing others to this strain of virus.  I only felt the extreme fatigue and effects of not feeling well for about 24 hours, so I am hoping Analia feels better today. 

Yesterday morning I made biscuits using the lard I rendered from our hogs and the raw milk from our cows.  I had some leftover roast beef and gravy and some leftover vegetable soup in the refrigerator.  I used the vegetables and beef along with some of the biscuit dough to make a pot pie at the same time I made my breakfast biscuits.  We met a friend for a quick meal out last night, so I still have the pot pie for a meal today or tomorrow. 

As we ate breakfast yesterday morning we watched two deer in the pines outside our window.  Mike has cleared some of the brush along the fence line and the leaves have fallen off some of the bushes and trees that were obstructing our views into the woods.  I knew the deer stayed in that area because when I walk up on the hill, I often scare them and they go bounding deeper into the forest.  We see deer all the time in Staunton but at a distance and always eating up the profits from our hay, corn or soy bean crops.  I know the deer will become a “nuisance” here as well as we plant a garden and they try to eat it, but for now, it’s relaxing to watch them in their natural habitat and so close to the house.  We see the deer in the meadow across the road every morning as well as a flock of wild turkey.  With fewer people in the area than what we have in the Shenandoah Valley, the wild life is less disturbed.  Alissa texted us on Thursday and asked us to call home ASAP.  (We have such poor cell service here that we often can’t receive calls but we can get texts about 75% of the time.  When we get a text to call, we search for a spot where we can get a bar or two of service on our phones and call out.  Sometimes we can manage a call standing in front of one particular window.  Other times, we have to hike up the hill to get service.)  Evidently a car had hit a young doe in front of our Staunton home and the deer had crawled into the field and lay their suffering and crying.  She wanted to know where we had a gun so that Gabino could put the poor thing out of its misery.  Then a friend who had delivered a few pumpkins to our house came across the deer and called Mike but he didn’t have a gun with him either.  He called the sheriff’s department and they said they were unable to send anyone out to take care of the situation.  Then Gabino called and told us about the deer and wanted to know where he could get a gun.  With every call we could hear the deer suffering and crying in the most hear wrenching way.  Mike needed Gab to go immediately to meet someone who was to pick up hay and had driven from Charlottesville, so he called his nephew who was able to go and end the poor deer’s suffering.  It sounds like such a simple “story” but it was quite the stir as one person after another called us while we were three hours away about the suffering deer that we could hear crying over the phone. 

October 22, 2017

Saturday we finally found an orchard and got some apples to keep in the cellar.  I have plenty of applesauce and pie filling from previous years, but I wanted some apples to store, eat fresh and have to cook with.  I thought we were never going to find the orchard.  We had been out driving once and knew the general area where the fruit orchards were, but the last time we went to find them, we didn’t have any luck.  This time I used the GPS but it took us to the back side of a mountain and while there were fruit trees, there was no packing shed or market.  We kept searching and found two large orchards on the “main” road but Mike was determined to find the obscure orchards and eventually we found one that was definitely operated by the locals who grew and harvested the fruit.  There were workers out picking apples as we could see the ladders moving from tree to tree.  They had a good variety and it was refreshing to see nice apples that had not been “graded” or waxed.  I got four half bushel boxes of a variety:  Granny Smith, Rome Beauties, Stamen and Pink Lady.  As soon as I got in the car, I wiped off a Rome apple and started eating it.  It was hard and crisp, the way an apple should be.  We also picked up three huge heads of mountain cabbage for a dollar each.  I couldn’t have been happier. 

Later in the day Mike and I worked together on the enclosed porch to try to start winterizing it.  The previous owners had put a washing machine hook up on the porch but since they had never used it throughout the winter months, they had not done anything to insure the porch stayed warm enough to keep things from freezing up.  The porch has the old, original, 1950’s type windows with individual, multiple glass panels that crank down to cover the window space.  When I first saw that back porch when we were house hunting, I fell in love with the original windows but we do not have storm windows for the inside and the cool air just comes right through.  During winter, it will be impossible to keep things from freezing up if we don’t do some winterizing.  I remembered when I lived in Alaska that we would buy the plastic that shrinks tight over the windows when you use a hair dryer on it and it made a big difference in keeping out the cold.  We bought a kit to cover the windows and old screen door that have has the same type of glass panels on it.  Of course, one project leads to another and I decided that all the screens had to come off and all that glass had to be washed inside and out before we put the plastic on.  Then, we started adjusting the door to make it fit tighter and taking down old hardware that had been used to hang blinds at one time.  I love the natural sunlight that comes through but I have some heavy-duty denim (seconds given to me by a cousin who works at the plant where they make denim) and I am going to make curtains to draw tight over the windows on those really cold winter days to help block out the cold.  We did get the door adjusted, cleaned, and the plastic in place.  We still have the windows to finish, as we will have to move the extra refrigerator that I have stored on the porch as well as a storage cabinet to finish the job.  Hopefully we will get that finished along with weather stripping around the door on the back porch and the front door as well when we return this week. 

Saturday evening a man we had met just a couple of times who bought some wooden toys off of us and whose mother bought some Corningware came flying in our driveway.  I greeted him warmly and he was polite but I could tell he was upset about something.  It didn’t take long for him to reveal the source of his frustration.  Evidently, the young man who was supposed to be working on our roof had “borrowed” tools and a pressure washer from this gentleman and then left them at our house.  We, of course, had no clue to whom the tools and equipment belonged and assumed they belonged to the one who was doing the work.  When the young man abandoned the job, he also abandoned the tools and equipment and the gentleman to whom they belonged had every reason to believe that we had taken his things, although we had no clue as to whom they belonged.  I think we got it all straightened out and I think the man went away knowing that we had no intention of keeping his things and in fact, had no clue as to whom they belonged. 

Sunday we got up and went over to the little Presbyterian Rock church.  I just love the little handful of people that attend there.  Already, when we walk through the door we receive lots of hugs and warm smiles. 

Sunday afternoon we gathered our things, locked up the house and made our way back to Staunton.  The traffic was horrific and Interstate 81 was such a contrast to the quiet backroads of the Blue Ridge Mountains. 

As I reflect back over this past week, it seems that life put a variety of people and situations in my path that caused me to stop and think about my reactions and how I could respond to each of those encounters.  For the introvert and the woman who would just as soon stay away from most encounters, my eyes were open to the importance of being open to each of these individuals and seeking out the best ways to respond whether it was the Asian college student who had just arrived in America and wanted to share his food with me, the agitated man looking for his tools and equipment, my fussy granddaughter who could not be consoled, or the warm hugs from new friends.