It's New Year's Eve

It's hard to believe that another year has gone by. Rather than get all emotional as I recount the sad times as well as the happy times that this year has brought, I thought I would fall back on the old "New Year's Resolutions" theme for this post.

Traditionally folks pick New Years day as the day to make a list of goals they would like to accomplish in the new year. While this is a wonderful idea, it seems that many times those New Year's resolution last about as long as it takes us to write them down on paper! That can be discouraging and cause us to not even want to attempt to make changes that need to be made.

I have been giving a lot of thought to food lately. (Imagine that!) There is a lot of information being put out now about buying local, buying organic, use of antibiotics as a preventative in food animals, etc. There is also quite a battle going on between Big Ag and the small family farms that are trying to offer a better choice for folks. (That will be "food for thought" for another post!) It occurred to me that all of this can actually become overwhelming and discouraging for folks who are trying to sort through it all and do better for their families. My life pretty much revolves around the whole process of supplying good food for my family and for the community. Even my "down time" is spent reading articles and researching information that is being presented about the important subject of food and there are times when I just want to throw up my hands and say, "There are too many conflicting ideas out there about what is important and what is not!"

I hope with this blog entry that I can encourage anyone reading it to just "do a little better this year" than you did last year when it comes to eating healthy and choosing food that is good for you. For some, that might mean giving up fast food for one day a week and making a healthy lunch to take with you to work. For someone else, that may mean cooking a "sit down" meal to share with your family once a week and instead of using processed food, cook with "real" food. For someone else, that may mean finding a source for locally grown beef that is not infused with anitibiotics. Big or small, whatever changes a person makes to improve the quality of what they eat is an accomplishment! And when you "fall off the wagon" don't look at it as a failure and quit trying. Just dust yourself off and try again. Maybe take smaller steps.

It would be nice if we could all grow our own food, raise our own meat and adhere strictly to all the suggestions given for eating healthy foods. The truth is that many times life gets in the way and we become overwhelmed and rather than do what we can, we just don't do anything.

I think you will find that with each small step that you take towards eating healthier, that you will find that makes you feel better physically and feel better about yourself. By taking baby steps and getting back up when you fall down, you are starting down the road to a healthier YOU! And by all means, don't let someone else "beat you up" with their ideas of what is best for your health and make you feel guilty. Do your own research and determine how YOU should be treating your body!

Happy New Year's Eve!

Grief Homework

At our grief support group last week we were suppose to take home a picture of a flower and on each of the petals write something that we lost when we lost our loved ones.

I remember getting the paper but don't have a clue what happened to it and never thought of it again. I really struggle with remembering and concentration issues.

So Cynthia, the counselor, passed the paper out to me again this week.

I just sat down and started it but when I looked at it and the instructions were to write down what we lost on each petal my first thought was to just put down "Everything".

But, the second paper she gave us this week was another flower and we were to write on it what we have left. So, I did that one first because it's easier for me to focus on the good.

Here is what I wrote:

God/Faith
Alissa
Mike
Mikey and Kristin
Family
Friends
Memories
My animals
Writing, journaling, blogging
Nature's beauty
Love

I am sure I can think of many more but those were the ones that just popped into my head as I began this assignment.

A couple of Quotes from Joel Salatin

Isn't it curious that at this juncture in our culture's evolution, we collectively believe Twinkies, Lucky Charms and Coca-Cola are safe foods, but compost-grown organic tomatoes and raw milk are not?
--from the forward, by Joel Salatin

“If every American for one week refused to eat at a fast-food joint, it would bring concentrated animal feeding operations to their knees.” –Joel Salatin of Polyface Farm

Partial Results on Raw Milk Survey

The Journal of Natural Food and Healing is sponsoring an informal Raw Milk Survey. So far, 1030 responses were received (from Dec 1 to Dec 20) of which 85% were raw milk drinkers. Here is a summary of the findings so far.

Health Benefits (of 877 raw milk drinkers)

74% have much health benefit

24% some

2% none

What all responders said about pasteurized milk:

62% believe it has long-term health effects

15% say it makes them very sick

40% say it tastes terrible

30% say it upsets their stomach

16% say it gives them diarrhea

And 53% say they will not spend their money to support the Milk Monopoly hurting dairy farmers

They will pay more for raw milk than for pasteurized

35% will pay double

26% will pay triple

16% will pay 50% more

5% will pay 25% more

90% of the raw milk drinkers will disobey the law to obtain it

There were 250 dairy farmers (or speaking for dairy farmers) responding:

If raw milk sales is or will be illegal:

53% will use herdshare programs where groups own a share of the herd

24% will disobey the law

11% will probably disobey the law

Only 3% will stop providing raw milk and obey the law

7% have to think about what they would do

79 responders said they would promote the survey on their website or blog. 348 would promote the survey by posting it on Facebook, twitter, discussion lists on the internet. Thanks to all of those that are helping to get the word out.

The survey is still on going.

Healing from Loss

Taken from the book A Time to Mourn, A Time to Dance:

"There is no straight line of healing from loss. In fact, there are multiple routes, including dead ends and blind spots. There are detours that cause us to change direction, often leaving us feeling lost and confused. Some potential detours can take us through shock, denial, and disbelief. Others may draw us into paths of anger, depression and despair." (Page 16)

How to Heal includes:

* Having the Experience. This is the entry point.

* Owning the Experience as a loss. This means not denying it, pretending it doesn't hurt, or minimizing it's importance.

* Willingness and readiness to walk the path of healing. The timing of healing is an individual thing.

* Hurting. There is no quick fix and no path that allows us to avoid the pain. We must face the pain and experience it.

* Expressing and not repressing the hurt. That means finding a support system or a friend who is willing to let us experience and share our feelings.

* Assessing and reevaluating ourselves and the situation. It may seem to delay our progress, but it's a necessary part of healing. Early grief it feels like we will never survive long enough to find the end of the maze.

* Learning to live with a redefinition of self. This final step requires finding ways to reinvest our emotional energy, rather han having all of our energy stuck in re-experiencing the loss. This takes place slowly over time. Expect set backs.

How Long Does Grief Last?

In the previous post, I wrote about the book A Time to Mourn, A Time to Dance and the grief support group that I started attending.

I wanted to follow up with a couple additional informational posts derived from the book.

One section of the book discusses the length of grief and how long one can expect the process to take.

As the book states on page 14:

Grief takes as long as it takes.

"Numbness is a gift, but as the numbness wears off - usually six to eight weeks after the loss - we really begin feeling the depth of the pain and the loneliness. The irony is that by that time, most of our friends have gone back to their own routine. It is then when we begin searching for the next yard-mark of hope."

The book goes on to discuss that the first year is basically surviving all the "firsts". Those of you who have followed along with me on this blog as I have travelled this road, know that each of the firsts have been especially hard for me. The first Thanksgiving, The first Christmas, The first Birthday, etc.

The books says, "Again and again we are faced wit yet another first. Maybe that's one of the reasons the first year is so hard. But the second year is hard too; not as hard, but the pain doesn't vanish on day 366. It's almost as if you have to get through the first year of pain before the healing can begin." (Page 14)

Then there are the anniversaries. As you know, for me, the anniversaries are very difficult. I still find myself shutting down every month in the middle of the month when I approach the 14th (the day that Josh was injured) and the 16th, the day that he died. I try to not think about it but actually ignoring it makes it worse for me. When I acknowledge the source of my pain, I am better able to deal with those days.

Also from the book (page 14):

"Healing becomes more about learning to incorporate the grief into our lives. Life begins to return to a new "normal". Many people say the scar becomes painful and visible around the anniversary time. Don't be surprised by anniversary reactions...................honor the experience, be gentle with yourself. You may feel like you are losing it or ashamed. Remember, anyone who has experienced a major loss has been there."

Grief Support

Fifteen months after Josh's death and I started going to a support group that is being held at our church for those who are suffering from grief. A year ago, I was not ready for such a group. Now the time is right for me to attend this group and join with others who are experiencing loss.

Grief has many similarities and many differences. Discusssing these things in a group of supportive people with a good grief counselor is a good way to work through some of the thoughts and feelings associated with the grief journey.

We are meeting every other week for six weeks. The first meeting for me was both a relief and also a struggle. It was a relief to speak of some of the things that troubled me. However, to speak of them also brought such pain that I had several days where I could do little more than try to get past those raw emotions.

At the support group, we were given a book called A Time to Mourn, A Time to Dance. This book was actually produced and given out to those who were touched directly and indirectly by the shootings at Virginia Tech. Lutheran Family Services produced the book and made it available to pastors and lay people in the area after this horrible incident.

There was surplus of these books and Dr. Cynthia Long (Lasher) who is running our support group has extras that she is giving away. The book is an easy read. (On a personal note, I first met Cynthia a couple of years ago when she contacted me about coordinating the purchase of a puppy for a relative who had recently lost his wife. The gentleman ended up buying two pups from me from two separate litters.)

The book points out that suffering grief does not just come from losing a loved one. One can suffer from grief anytime there is a significant loss in life. This would experiencing the empty nest syndrome when young adult children leave home, losing a job, divorce, dealing with a life threatening illness in a child or other family member.............basically anything that "robs" us of what we consider "normal".

The book says: Grief has no rules. Not everyone will respond the same way.

The following are some ways that one might respond to grief:

shock, numbness, disbelief, tears, life takes on an unreal quality almost like a fog has descended, anger, irritability and a sense of helplessness, sadness, depression, mood swings, anxious, fearful, lonely, vulnerable, feeling like you might be crazy, sometimes a feeling of relief and then feeling guilty for those feelings of relief.

There are also physical sensations in response to grief:

"When we are stressed, our nervous system automatically produces chemicals, One is called adrenaline. The release of this chemical and others in our body cuases the feeling of breathlessness with frequent sighing. Other sensations include tightness in the chest, increased heart rate, palpitations, cold clammy hands, dry mouth and headaches.

As the stress continues, our bodies try to adapt by relasing even more chemicals. The relase of these chemicals helps explain a rise in blood pressure, shortness of breath, feelings of dizziness, a change in appetite, nausea and feelings of anxiousness or excitability.

Other symptoms including fatigue, lack of energy and lack of motiviation can also be biochemically based. There are also changes in our immune system which leave us more susceptible to infections or disease.

These symptoms are all based on the fact that our body is trying to react and respond to a painful situation. We can do things to try and help our body, but to try to stop the reaction would be like eating a sandwich and telling your stomach not to digest it." (from page 11)


In addition there are thought pattern disturbances including the inability to concentrate, forgetfullness, inability to manage time and a preoccupation with the loss.

Behavioral changes might include sleep disturbance, sleeping all the time, need for social contact or need to withdraw, need to be held and hugged or need to be left alone, gathering pictures and memorabilia or locking them all away out of sight. These behaviors are individual and are neither right or wrong.

From page 13 in the book:

"Grief is not dictated by rules or absolutes. Just as each of us is our own unique person, our grief also is uniquely our own. Not better. Not worse. Just ours."

The Story of the Bored Corgi

Spencer, the Corgi, was very bored. There had been so much snow and cold that his Dachshund friends did not want to come out and play. Not one to sit around feeling sorry for himself, Spencer decided to try to play a game called "pull the tarp off the round bale".

He pulled and pulled and pulled but that tarp just wouldn't budge!

Finally, Spencer had enough exercise and lay down to take a nap.

The End.

Chickens are on Strike

Thanks to the snow storm that forced all the hens to stay indoors (a change to their free range lifestyle), the dark days that we have been having (thank goodness we are gaining daylight now AND getting some sunshine), the fact that I waited too late to get a light on them (I thought they were laying well and didn't really need the light yet), and due to dietary changes (I have sold a cow, dried off a cow and added more share members so they have not had any clabbered milk which gives them lots of protein) my hens have officially gone on strike. Out of 60+ hens, I am getting between four and eight eggs a day.

Any type of change can cause hens to go into a molt (and when they molt they don't lay) and unfortunately some of my tempermental little ladies are also molting and look like naked little birds. Poor things!

It won't be long and the sun will shine more and longer and the warmer weather will come and the hens will get back unto the spirit of things. Until then, we just are not going to have a whole lot of eggs available.

A Few Recipes I used Over Christmas

Here are three recipes that I used either on Christmas Eve or Christmas day. The first recipe is an Angel Biscuit recipe and serves a dual purpose. The recipe makes the most delicious rolls that you can mix up ahead of time and refrigerate. Or, you can use the very same dough, roll it thin, put butter, sugar and cinnamon on it, roll it, slice it, bake it and have cinnamon rolls! I then simply top with a glaze made from butter, powdered sugar, a bit of vanilla and enough cream or milk to make thin enough to spread on the cinnamon rolls.

Angel Biscuits

5 Cups plain flour
1/4 cup sugar
3 tsp baking powder
1 tsp soda
1 tsp salt
3/4 cup shortening (I use butter instead)
1 pkg dry yeast (or 1 Tablspoon of bulk yeast)
2 Tablespoons of warm water
2 Cups buttermilk (or clabbered milk)


Sift together flour, sugar, baking powder, soda and salt. Stir in shortening. Meanwhile, dissolve yeast in 2 tbsp. warm water and add to buttermilk. Then add this to the flour mixture; mix well. Turn out on a lightly floured board and knead. If necessary, add additional flour to make soft dough. Roll out dough about 1/2 inch thick. Cut with biscuit cutter.

Bake at 400 degrees for 15 minutes. Biscuits are better if you let them rise before baking. Doough may be stored in the refrigerator.

Granny Durham's Biscuits

I remember watching Granny make these melt in your mouth biscuits. She mixed and kneaded everything right in the bowl and did not measure anything. We actually got the recipe when my mom stood beside her, watched, measured and wrote things down. Otherwise it was a "pinch of this" and a "pinch of that". There are a number of us kids an grandkids that use Granny's recipe, but no one will ever be able to make them like she did.

2 cups all purpose flour
2 tsp. baking powder
1 tsp salt
1/2 tsp soda
1/3 cup shortening (I use butter)
2/3 cup buttermilk (or clabbered milk)

Heat oven to 450 degrees. Measure flour, soda, salt and baking powder into a bowl. Cut in shortening. Stir in buttermilk. Knead, roll, cut out, bake.

The last recipe is for Oyster Stew and is very simple. However the stew was absolutely fabulous because of all the wonderful ingredients used to make it! Thanks to my friend, Theresa Taylor, (who bought Cookie and Red Bull) we were able to have wonderful Louisana oysters for our stew. Of course, the milk and butter used in the stew were only the very best from our wonderful cows!

Oyster Stew

1/4 cup finely chopped shallot or onion
1 Tablespoon butter
1 pint of shucked oysters, undrained
1/2 tsp salt (I added salt to taste)
2 cups heavy cream (yum!)
1 cup milk
Pepper to taste

In a large saucepan cook shallot in hot butter until tender. Stir in undrained oysters and salt. Bring to boil. Reduce to medium. Cook for 3 to 5 minutes or until oysters curl around the edges, stirring occasionally.

Stir in cream and milk. Add pepper to taste. Heat through.

Memory Wall at Fort Defiance High School

Pictures of the memory wall at Fort Defiance High School where the kids paint the names of deceased students. These pictures were taken before Angela's name was added to the wall.

The other picture is of the sign at our church. When we can't see with our eyes, we continue to look with our hearts.

More Pictures the Snowstorm

Alissa, took these pictures of our snow storm last week. I thought it captured the depth of the snow much better than I was able to do with the rural pictures that I took.

Celebrating Christmas with Jesus

Remembering those we love so much, who are celebrating Christmas with Jesus.

Homesick by Mercy Me

You're in a better place, I've heard a thousand times
And at least a thousand times I've rejoiced for you
But the reason why I'm broken, the reason why I cry
Is how long must I wait to be with you

I close my eyes and I see your face
If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
I've never been more homesick than now

Help me Lord cause I don't understand your ways
The reason why I wonder if I'll ever know
But, even if you showed me, the hurt would be the same
Cause I'm still here so far away from home

I close my eyes and I see your face
If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
I've never been more homesick than now

In Christ, there are no goodbye
And in Christ, there is no end
So I'll hold onto Jesus with all that I have
To see you again
To see you again

And I close my eyes and I see your face
If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
Won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
Won't you give me strength to make it through somehow

I've never been more homesick than now.

Click to hear this song by MERCY ME.

Pictured: Joshua Hall, Angela Kania and Amy Ruble

Looking for the Messiah

Looking for the Messiah,
Part 1
by Max Lucado

SUPPOSE JESUS CAME to your church. I don’t mean symbolically. I mean visibly. Physically. Actually. Suppose he came to your church.

Would you recognize him? It might be difficult. Jesus didn’t wear religious clothes in his day. Doubtful that he would wear them in ours. If he came today to your church, he’d wear regular clothes. Nothing fancy, just a jacket and shoes and a tie. Maybe a tie … maybe not.

He would have a common name. “Jesus” was common. I suppose he might go by Joe or Bob or Terry or Elliot.

Elliot … I like that. Suppose Elliot, the Son of God, came to your church.

Of course, he wouldn’t be from Nazareth or Israel. He’d hail from some small spot down the road like Hollow Point or Chester City or Mt. Pleasant.

And he’d be a laborer. He was a carpenter in his day. No reason to think he’d change, but let’s say he did. Let’s say that this time around he was a plumber. Elliot, the plumber from Mt. Pleasant.

God, a plumber?

Rumor has it that he fed a football field full of people near the lake. Others say he healed a senator’s son from Biloxi. Some say he’s the Son of God. Others say he’s the joke of the year. You don’t know what to think.

And then, one Sunday, he shows up.

About midway through the service he appears in the back of the auditorium and takes a seat. After a few songs he moves closer to the front. After yet another song he steps up on the platform and announces, “You are singing about me. I am the Son of God.” He holds a Communion tray. “This bread is my body. This wine is my blood. When you celebrate this, you celebrate me!”

What would you think?

Would you be offended? The audacity of it all. How irreverent, a guy named Elliot as the Son of God!

Would you be interested? Wait a minute, how could he be the Son of God? He never went to seminary, never studied at a college. But there is something about him …

Would you believe? I can’t deny it’s crazy. But I can’t deny what he has done.

It’s easy to criticize contemporaries of Jesus for not believing in him. But when you realize how he came, you can understand their skepticism.

Jesus didn’t fit their concept of a Messiah. Wrong background. Wrong pedigree. Wrong hometown. No Messiah would come from Nazareth. Small, hick, one-stoplight town. He didn’t fit the Jews’ notion of a Messiah, and so, rather than change their notion, they dismissed him.

He came as one of them. He was Jesus from Nazareth. Elliot from Mt. Pleasant. He fed the masses with calloused hands. He raised the dead wearing bib overalls and a John Deere Tractor cap.

They expected lights and kings and chariots from heaven. What they got was sandals and sermons and a Galilean accent.

And so, some missed him.

And so, some miss him still.

From A Gentle Thunder
Copyright (Thomas Nelson, 1987) Max Lucado


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Story of the Bored Heifer

Once upon a time there was a big snowstorm that dumped 24 inches of snow at the Cupp's house in Staunton, Virginia. Twenty-four inches is a lot of snow for cows (and people) who are not use to it.

The cattle had been "holed up" for five whole days. Even though they had access to the pasture, they simply decided it was not worth the effort to break through the drifted snow. After all these cows all came from further south in Alabama and Georgia (except for Maya who is a Virginia cow). They simply were not use to such winter weather!

Finally, one day, a brave heifer decided that she had simply had enough and cabin fever was just too much! So, she bravely set out to take a walk to the end of the pasture.

She stopped, looked around and decided there was nothing to see and nothing to eat and she would just head back to the barn yard where Mike had pushed pushed the snow back with the tractor.

The End.

A Change of Address

Today my heart is a thousand miles away united with the friends and family of Amy Ruble. The family will say goodbye today to Amy's beautiful earthly body, that body that they love very much. However, Amy's spirit is very much alive and well, free from pain and suffering, and rejoicing in Heaven with the Father. I love what Amy's dad said in his sermon last Sunday that I had the opportunity to listen to online. He said, "Amy changed her address." I love that because it so simply states the truth. Amy no longer lives at this earthly address but instead has a permanent, heavenly address.

A flood of memories have filled my heart and mind the past few days since I learned of Amy's passing. Memories of Amy, of her siblings, of her parents. Things I have not thought about in years. The Rubles have been a constant source of strength and encouragment to my family over the years and how blessed we are that they are part of our lives.

May God grant this precious family His peace on this difficult day and may they continue to find their strenth in Him.

Oatmeal Cookies

Blogging has become a great way for me to keep track of my favorite recipes while at the same time share them with others.

Mike loves Oatmeal Cookies. I have a batch in the oven right now!

Oatmeal Cookies

3/4 cup butter softened
1 cup packed brown sugar
1/2 cup granulated sugar
1 tsp. baking powder
1/4 teaspoon soda
1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
2 eggs
1 tsp vanilla
1 3/4 cups all purpose flour
2 cups rolled oats
1 cup coconut (optional)

Beat butter, sugars, baking powder, baking soda and cinnamon. Add eggs and vanilla and continue to beat. Beat in as much of the flour as possible with the mixer. Stir in the rest of flour, oats and coconut.

Drop by rounded teaspoons two inches apart on ungreased baking sheet.

Bake 8 minutes per batch at 375 degrees

(OK, I admit, I make my cookies bigger than the recipe suggests!)

Easy Fudge

Most of the time, making things the old fashioned way is the only way to go! I mean, things just taste better when extra time and special ingredients are used to produce a food item that tickles the taste buds!

However, I cheat when I make fudge. I make it in the microwave.

While I had one person tell me that it was good but "not as good as mom's" for the most part, folks never even know it's the "easy version" unless I tell them.

So, make some fudge using this easy recipe and just let your friends think that you spent hours in the kitchen with a secret recipe!

Easy Fudge

3 cups semi sweet chocolate chips
1 14 oz can of sweetened condensed milk
1/4 cup butter
1 cup walnuts or pecans

Place all ingredients, except nuts, in a large bowl. Microwave until chips are melted, 3-5 minutes, stirring once or twice during cooking. Stir in nuts. Pour into well buttered square baking dish, 8x8 inches. Refrigerate until set. Makes 16 (2 inch) pieces.

Note: Have fun with this recipe by trying different flavored chips. Try a mixture of peanut butter and chocolate. Try some butterscotch chips. Try making it with white chocolate. Try it with or without the nuts.

Enjoy!

Peppermint Bark

A share member brought me some delicious candy and then shared with me the recipe!

I promise, you will love it!


16 oz. semi sweet chocolate chips
6T butter
2 1/2 cups rice krispies
18 oz. white chocolate chips
18 oz candy canes or similar peppermint candy


Krispy chocolate layer
Melt semi-sweet chocolate and butter in microwave. Stir in Krispies. Put mixture on cookie sheet. Place wax paper over entire mixture and roll it smooth with rolling pin. Remove wax paper and put in freezer for a few minutes to harden slightly.




White chocolate and peppermint layer
Melt white chocolate in mirowave. Pour over krispy chocolate layer, spreading to edges. Sprinkle with 1 1/2 cups of crushed peppermint.


Put cookie sheet in freezer until bark is hard. Slide off cookie sheet an cut on cutting board using large knife.

Still Digging Out!

2009 Christmas Letter

While I would love to have been able to mail this letter to everyone I know to let you know that I am thinking about you, I am resorting to "cyber copies" for most folks!

Wish everyone a wonderful holiday season!

Tammy

Dear Friends and Family

Christmas is a time when we celebrate; however, most of the world has lost sight of the reason we celebrate. We do not remember that the true meaning of Christmas is the Child . That Child has many names and each name describes His character. The prophet Isaiah wrote of His coming and said:

“For to us a child is born………
And he will be called
Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God,
Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.” ~ Isaiah 9:6

How we struggle in this difficult world filled with evil and heartache. How we long for a world where there is no more pain and suffering! We know that this earth and its people will never achieve perfection. As long as we live in an imperfect world, we will deal with sadness and turmoil. Yet, as we make our way through this life, we have the promise that that baby born and placed in a manger on that first Christmas morning, the Prince of Peace, is with us.

"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." ~John 16:33

Our family and extended family have faced repeated grief in the last 18 months and while our faith does not keep our hearts from hurting, it does give us the ability to continue to find purpose in life. Faith fills our hearts with the peace that comes from knowing that someday we will see our loved ones once again. When we come face to face with the Prince of Peace and are able to hold our loved ones in our arms on that day, there will be no more pain, suffering or heartache. There will be perfect peace for all of eternity.

He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, …..."~Revelation 21:4

In the past eighteen months our extended family has lost grandmothers, grandfathers, and a mother. In our immediate family, Mikey and Kristin’s maternal grandmother passed away. Mike’s 16 year old niece passed away, and as most of you know, Tammy’s son Joshua passed away in September of 2008. In addition, we have lost two of our precious pets this past year.

It cannot be argued that grief changes a person’s entire life and forces individuals to find a “new normal” because life will never be the same again for those who remain. We are so thankful for our family and friends who surround us with love. We are also thankful for the wonderful gifts that are bestowed upon us every day by the Prince of Peace who gives us the strength to find joy even in the midst of sorrow.

One of the beauties of farm life is that as the seasons come and go there are routines that remain. Normal daily activities that some might find mundane, in fact give us a balance and bring comfort. The day to day farm life provides structure and forces us to embrace the beauty of God’s creation, as slowly our eyes begin to open once again to life. With each calf that is born, each puppy that survives and grows, the little peeps that hatch from the eggs, and the plants as they come to life out of the soil and grow to their full potential, we are reminded that life continues and joy remains.

We continue to grow and sell produce in season. Our largest crop would be our potatoes as we plant about three acres of them every year. Although, we do have a restaurant that buys potatoes from us on a weekly basis, we sell them to individual’s right from the farm for the most part. We also raise beef cows and take the calves to the market twice a year. We have had a good year selling steers f to individuals interested in locally grown, pastured beef. We also grow a good bit of hay each year for our own use and to sell.

Our cow share program which allows share members in Virginia to legally be able to get fresh, raw milk from the farm has grown by leaps and bounds this year. We have added two new standard Jersey heifers to our Jersey herd. These heifers will calve in the spring and early summer. We now own two registered Miniature Jersey cows, three registered standard Jersey cows, and one purebred Jersey that is not registered. We also have three Jersey heifer calves that have been born in the last year in addition to several bull calves that will either be sold as stud animals or be raised for beef. In addition, we still have our free range hens and have added two miniature Nubian dairy goats. The goats are still young but we plan to buy or a rent a buck and breed them next fall. We are enjoying all the dairy products made from raw milk including butter, cottage cheese, mozzarella cheese, a variety of cheese spreads, sour cream, kefir, yogurt, ice cream and even hard cheese.

The past year has given us opportunities to spend time with our families. Mike’s family is good about getting together for holidays and special occasions and “just because”. We have been so blessed to live close to them and have their continuous love and support. While the past year has been difficult, it has also helped us to draw even closer as a family.

We were able to make the trip to Charleston, South Carolina for a few days this year to visit with Mike’s daughter Kristin. Tammy’s dad has made the trip to Virginia from Missouri twice this past year and her mom has been able to visit once during that time and intends on visiting again soon. Tammy’s sister, Elizabeth was able to visit with us as well while she was home from Korea. Tammy, Mike and Alissa were able to make a trip to Georgia over Thanksgiving weekend and spend time with Tammy’s Grandparents, Dad, Mom, two brothers and their families, as well as uncles, aunts and cousins. This was the first time in four years that we have been able to join Tammy’s family for a holiday. We really missed Elizabeth, Tammy’s sister, who is teaching English in South Korea and was not able to be with us.

We are thankful that the kids are doing well and have jobs during these tough economic times. Kristin works as an executive assistant at a bank in Charleston, South Carolina. Mikey works as a night auditor for Holiday Inn here in Staunton and has done very well in that position. Alissa is still working as a waitress as Red Lobster while attending college full time and making good grades. We are thankful for all of our children and are proud of them for doing so well in their jobs and with school.

We are thankful for our friends far and near and we want to wish each of you a blessed Holiday season. We pray that no matter where life may take, through the joys and the sorrows, that you will find comfort in knowing the Prince of Peace.

All our love,

Mike and Tammy Cupp

Banana Nut Muffins

When my brother asked me if I had a special recipe for banana bread, I immediately thought to look on line and see if it was posted there! Sure enough, it is!

My grandma, Neva Starnes, likes to joke that a recipe she got from me made her famous. She submitted the recipe to Taste of Home a few years back and they published the recipe along with a lovely picture of the muffins their chefs had made using the Banana Nut Muffin recipe.

If you want a full dozen muffins or a loaf of banana bread, just double the recipe. The magazine actually cut the recipe in half so that they could publish it in their "Cooking for Two" section.


A scattering of chopped walnuts adds crunch to these moist, taste-tempting muffins from Neva Starnes of Summerville, Georgia.


Ingredients
1/4 cup butter, softened
1/2 cup sugar
1 egg
3/4 cup mashed ripe banana
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 cup all-purpose flour
3/4 teaspoon baking powder
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/8 teaspoon baking soda
1/8 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/4 cup chopped walnuts
Directions
In a small bowl, cream butter and sugar. Beat in the egg, banana and vanilla. Combine the flour, baking powder, salt, baking soda and cinnamon; add to creamed mixture just until moistened. Fold in walnuts.
Coat muffin cups with cooking spray or use paper liners; fill two-thirds full with batter. Bake at 350° for 23-25 minutes or until a toothpick comes out clean. Cool for 5 minutes before removing from pan to a wire rack. Serve warm. Yield: 6 muffins.


Nutrition Facts: 1 muffin equals 278 calories, 12 g fat (5 g saturated fat), 56 mg cholesterol, 263 mg sodium, 40 g carbohydrate, 2 g fiber, 5 g protein.

Banana Nut Muffins published in Cooking for 2 Winter 2007, p23

A December Letter from Ben

Well, I know I haven’t written in a long time, but whadda ya expect. I’ll be six whole months old next Tuesday, and I’ve been very busy. There are so many new things to do and so many things to taste and smell and eat (when Larry’s not looking).



Today, though, and last night was just amazing. All this white stuff falling from the sky and piling up, and I mean really piling up. S’posed to be some kinda record. I was scared at first and cried a little bit when I had to go out. Today, I really got into it, running down the sidewalk and jumping over the little drifts. Larry was so slow, and I kept having to wait for him. He kept me walking until I did what I was out there to do, and I didn’t mind a bit. Best of all, there was this little girl being dragged along on a garbage can lid by her dad. I jumped right on and gave her lots of kisses. She loved it, and after lots of fun she carried me back to Larry. I wasn’t on a leash; there wasn’t any traffic and I could run anywhere I wanted, ‘cept where the snow was just too deep.



Week before last, we had a party at the house. Really fun people! I was so excited I kept getting into trouble. I jumped down from one chair right up onto another and into this lady’s lap, and I did it so fast I made her spill her wine. Oh well, it was white. After a bit, Larry told me it would be a good idea to get into my crate. I got in there just to shut him up, but one of the guests came and rescued me after a bit. I hope there’ll be more parties. More people mean more fun, and if one of ‘em gets tired, there’s always someone else to play with.



Oh yes, I almost forgot. On Thursday, at least I think it was Thursday. Larry got me a hedgehog over at the Old Town School for Dogs. It’s almost as big as I am. I wouldn’t have anything to do with it for a day or two, ‘cause it was a little scary. Yesterday morning, I barked at it for twenty minutes, and it didn’t do anything. So, after I figured out it wasn’t dangerous I started to play with it. It makes this really weird hedgehog kind of noise when you press it. Fun! This morning, after coming in out of the snow, I slept with it in front of the fireplace. What fun!



Well, I don’t wanna overdue it, or you’ll expect long letters all the time, so have a Merry Christmas and give a pet to every dog you meet.



Your little Ben

Cows in the Snow

What Do You Say?

Last night, a friend lost a sister. Her parents, who are also my friends lost a daughter. Today when I found out, my heart just broke. My instant reaction was to want to shield the family from the pain. Impossible. I want to make it better. I can't. I want to find the right words to say. There are no words eloquent enough to stop the pain.

So I pray. I cry. I think about them. I will give them some more time and then I will call them. I will tell them how much I love them. It's not enough, but it's all I can do.

More Snow Storm Pictures

The quality of these pictures is not the best but it will give you an idea of the conditions this morning when we went out to milk. Although they don't begin to compair to my Alaska days, it is quite a storm for Virginia! Josh always wanted to see a big snow storm here and complained that Virginia did not have enough of the white stuff! Since he was my Alaska baby (being born in Fairbanks) he naturally loved winter weather! I know he would have been thrilled to see the snow coming down and would have been giddy with excitement! In fact, I am not too sure he didn't ask Someone to send it just it time for Christmas this year!

Major Snowstorm Hits the Area!

Advent Conspiracy Promo Video

Wonderful video on You Tube celebrating the Advent season.

There is a sacredness in tears..............

There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than 10,000 tongues. They are the messengers of overwhelming grief, of deep contrition and of unspeakable love. ~ Washington Irving

Spencer

PJ (Peanut Junior)

Not All Butter Churns are Created Equal

Although I don't have exhausted experience with butter churns, it has come to my attention that they just are not all created equal.

While the old fashioned hand crank butter churns are beautiful and nostalgic, I prefer to use an electric butter churn. When all the cows are in milk, it is not unheard of for me to churn as much as ten gallons of cream a week. I would spend a lot of time making butter if I had to do it all by hand!

When I first began looking for an electric churn I found reproductions available at Lehmans and at Hoeggers. However, I could not see spending $280+ for an electric churn if I could find another solution!

I began to look at antique stores and it was not long until I found a 1940-50's era electric churn. I paid $65 for it. The store owner was more than willing for me to plug it in and check it out to make sure that it ran. He was fascinated by the idea that someone would actually make butter from their own raw milk in today's society.

The original electric churn I bought was a Gem Dandy made by Alabama Manufacturing Company in Birmingham, Alabama. It will hold three gallons of cream, but because one
must allow for expansion of the cream (it first changes to whipped cream and then to butter), I only put in 2.5 gallons of cream. This churn served me well for about a year but due to a poor design with the cord, it eventually frayed and broke off. Thinking it was not that big a deal to replace the cord, my husband took it to the shop to repair it. However, he soon found out that due to the way the metal casing was made around the motor, it was not easy to get to the cord to repair it. He and a friend (who likes butter) got together and they still were not able to get the casing off. So, the friend took it to a manufacturing company where someone in the machine shop did us a favor and finally got the darn thing off. The cord was replaced but we knew it would be only a matter of time before we had trouble with it again.

The cord is not secured in any way on this design and the lid screws on to the jar meaning that the cord is twisted around and around every time that it is put on the jar. This particular motor/blade assembly is a Gem Dandy model that came with the jar.

Knowing that I did not want to be without an electric churn should something happen to my original, I began searching for another one in antique stores. We finally found one for $45. (There were always models available for much more, but I refuse to pay the price for them!) Upon closer inspection, it became apparent that it was actually the jar from a Gem Dandy model and the motor/blade assembly from Dixie Maid. The jar was a five gallon jar instead of a three gallon.

This past week the cord on my original churn again became frayed and broke off. Forced to bring out my back up, I soon realized that I like it much better.

The motor/blade assembly does not screw on. This means that the cord is not twisted around and around with each use. In addition, I can actually use it on any size jar or even on a crock if I desire. I also find the blade assembly much easier to clean. In addition, the cord is fitted in such a way that it is clamped and it has an on and off switch, a feature that the other one does not have.

I will get the original churn repaired and use it as a back-up just in case I ever have problems with this one, but for the record, I am much happier with the Dixie Maid churn assembly!

(Note: The churn in the first picture is the preferred churn. The motor assembly and blade just "set" on top of the jar. The second picture is of the freyed cord on the less desirable motor/blade assembly. Because the lid must be screwed on, the cord is twisted round and around every time, causing it to break.)

Send a Christmas Card?

Our family and extended family became aware of a ten year old girl in Harrisonburg, VA (about 20 minutes from our farm) who has terminal cancer. Her only request for Christmas was that she receive 1000 Christmas cards. She said rather than gifts, she wanted cards. I thought this was a strange request until I began thinking about it.

When we leave this world, we can't take anything with us other than the love we have in our hearts. This little girl is very wise.

If you would like to send her a card, you may do so at the following address:

Danielle Bartlett
1820 Heritage Center Way
Harrisonburg, VA 22801

Thank you!

Tammy

PS

Iit seems that the facts might have been wrong concerning this little girl. It does appear that she had a brain tumor but that it is now under control. She originally requested 1000 get well cards through Make A Wish Foundation, I believe.

http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/daniellebartlett

I am glad that she is doing better.

I even asked the individual I received the information from if they were sure about the facts, so I did not research it before hand. That will teach me! ;-)

However, I am sure she would enjoy getting more cards if anyone would still like to send them!

An Angel's Kiss

Last night, I was so sad. I was cleaning out some drawers and the pictures, cards, and things I found reminded me of Josh. I wanted to scream but all I could do was cry.

It's that time of the month again when all those feelings come to the surface.

Today marks the second month since Angela's death and 15 months since the night I found out about Josh. (He actually passed away on the 16th.)

Yesterday, Angela's mom went with me to the cemetery to put flowers on both Angela and Josh's graves. The flowers were beautiful. Josh's Grandma Kay made them. They are Christmas arrangements.

Last night as I slept, I felt something brush my cheek. The softest kiss that felt like butterfly wings or the brush of an angel. Then I realized it was Angela. She smiled at me like she always did after giving me a kiss on the cheek. I smiled back.

Just a dream? Yes. A beautiful, beautiful dream. Just for a second, I felt her kiss. What a beautiful gift.

Sadness

Photographs, like memories, bring sadness as well as joy. How can it be that the very things that bring such comfort also cause so much pain? To love so deeply and not be able to reach out and hold the one you love so much, is torture. Yet, had I known, still I would have gladly chosen the pain over not having ever had the chance to love that child so completely.

Frontier Formulas

My friend Liz loaned me a recipe book so long ago that I am embarrassed to admit I still have it! (Please remind me to give it back to you the next time we meet, Liz!)

It is really a neat book. It is called Frontier Formulas by Bess A. Cleveland with a copy write date of 1952, Juneau, Alaska. Amazing to me that this book was printed before Alaska even achieved statehood in 1959!!!!

It is filled with good sounding recipes, including a section on preparing wild game such as bear, caribou, moose, reindeer, wild duck, grouse, ptarmigan, wild rabbit and squirrels.

In addition, there is a whole section devoted to "Frontier Formulas".

Having the convenience of a grocery store on every corner, we have lost many of the skills that pioneers and homesteaders used over the years. These things always interest me and I have an insatiable desire to learn how to do things the "old fashioned way". I don't always do things the old way, but I like to try them and at least have that information and knowledge should I ever need it.

Excerpts, examples, formulas and recipes from the book:

One pint of potato yeast, one cup of hop yeast, one dry yeast cake two inches square, two-thirds cup yeast crumbs, two teaspoons fast rising dry yeast granules, and one half ounce cake of compressed yeast are equal to each other in strength.

Baking Powder:
2 tsp cream of tartar
1 tsp soda
1 tsp corn starch

To Keep Eggs:
Be sure to have strictly fresh eggs. Put a two-inch layer of salt in the bottom of a stoneware crock or jar, then a layer of eggs, placing the large end down; another layer of salt, then eggs. Repeat until eggs are all used or jar is full, having a layer of salt on top and no egg showing. Cover and put in place that is cold but not cold enough to freeze. This is a simple, inexpensive way which has been tested for many years. There is a difference of opinion as to whether the large end or the small end of the egg should be down. The air chamber is in the larger end and if this end is placed down the yolk will not break through and touch the shell.

Lacto Bacillus Buttermilk
1 cup milk
1 cup lukewarm water
1 tablet Bacillus Bulgaricus

Combine the milk and warm water, add the bacillus tablet and let stand in a warm place two days. Whip with an egg beater and chill. Salt may be added to taste. One tablespoon dried starter may be used instead of the tablet.

Buttermilk Starter
To make a starter that will keep indefinitely, pour a small amount of buttermilk on a glass platter. Allow it to dry at room temperature until it forms a crust. Scrape the crust form the platter and place the flakes in a jar with a tight cover. Use the flakes as a starter instead of a tablet Bacillus Bulgaricus.

Home Made Vinegar
14 pounds of coarse brown sugar
6 gallons water
1 cup yeast

Boil the sugar with four gallons of water and skim while boiling. When it has boiled ten minutes, remove from fire, add the remaining two gallons of cold water and strain into a keg. Spread the yeast, which should be lively and fresh, on small pieces of toast and toss into the liquid. Stir every day for eight days. On the ninth day stir well, tack a piece of gauze cloth over the bunghole, place the keg where the sun will sine on it and let stand six months. It is best to make vinegar in the spring of the year.

A dry yeast cake or brewers yeast may be used. It will shorten the time when the vinegar will be good for use if a "Mother" from a former keg of vinegar is put into the liquid just before placing the keg in the sun.


I will post a few more formulas and recipes in the days to come!